


Blue

by ailaikclarke



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, I’m sorry, SuperCorp, Supercorp endgame, no I’m not
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-10
Updated: 2019-05-10
Packaged: 2020-02-29 06:43:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 777
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18773347
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ailaikclarke/pseuds/ailaikclarke
Summary: Kara ages a lot slower than humans. Lena is a human.ORWhen we were young and careless, I never thought about this moment.When I was wondering about how to tell you about my secret identity, I never thought about this moment.I have never pictured it in my head, not even once. I have never closed my eyes and watched this moment unfold before me. I have never even dreamed of it.





	Blue

When we were young and careless, I never thought about this moment.  
When I was wondering about how to tell you about my secret identity, I never thought about this moment.

I have never pictured it in my head, not even once. I have never closed my eyes and watched this moment unfold before me. I have never even dreamed of it.

I have to admit, though, that it came too early. I have spent most of my life worrying about other people, about their safety and wellbeing. My birth family was taken from me, but I got a new one when I got to Earth.  
Eliza, Jeremiah and Alex. Oh, Alex.

Then I got you. My dearest. My love. My beloved Lena.

You used to say it a lot. A Super and a Luthor.

But we were so much more than that, weren’t we? We were so much more than our names, so much more than our families, so much more than our duties.

We were Kara and Lena and I truly believed that nothing could stop us. We’ve been through so much, we’ve suffered so much, we’ve laughed so much… It all made me believe that there was no foreseeable ending to us.

Then why am I here, writing this? Why am I here thinking these words and putting them down on paper? Why is this my reality?

I have here with me the notebook with your poems. I remember when I saw this one for the first time. It was the first I ever read something written by you and it quickly became my favourite, for a lot of different reasons.

 _In a dream, I’d be chasing you._  
Hoping for a last chance,  
Maybe one last dance,  
While staring into that blue.

 _In real life, I stand still._  
_As you walk away,_  
_In the cold light of day,  
I watch you from my windowsill._

 

Seeing this in my handwriting feels wrong. Your version makes me feel at peace. It didn’t the first time I read it, but it does now. The weather that night was similar to what I’m seeing today.

It’s snowing outside, which seems fitting. 

I can’t believe how much you’ve physically changed throughout the years and how you still look the same to me. I can still see those fiery green eyes when you get mad at me, even though they’re now surrounded by tiny wrinkles. I can still picture you with black hair, even though it turned completely white a long time ago. I sometimes still wait for you to put on your expensive high heels, even though I know that neither your knees nor your ankles would appreciate that. I close my eyes and still see the Lena I fell in love with.

I’m sure you experience the same with me, it’s not like I haven’t aged. I’m... Slower than you, but I’m getting there. I might have super-speed, but you like being first in everything you do.

I wish I could write you a poem to tell you how much I love you.

I wish I could paint you a picture to show you how much I love you.

 

What I can do right now, is hope that you know. I can hope that I’ve told you enough and that you’ve believed me all those times I’ve said it. I can only hope that what I did was enough and that you know that I loved you like children love. That I love you like teenagers do and that I will love you like adults do. I am still not mature enough to do that. Or maybe I am, I’m just hoping I can find a way to love you like I always have even now that I can’t show it to you. Or, rather, even now that you can’t see it anymore.

I have been on this Earth for a long time, and I’ve spent most of it loving you. I can’t picture a life without your beautiful brain, or your deep eyes, or fantastic soul next to me, but I guess I’ll have to figure something out.

I promised you I wouldn’t cry and, yet, here I am. 

The glass of whiskey you asked for is still there. Half-empty. The ice is still floating in the dark liquid, slowly melting. Your hand is still in mine, but you’re not holding it anymore. I can feel it getting colder as time passes, but I just can’t let it go. Your skin looks paler than usual, almost like porcelain. You look relaxed, untouched by the moodiness of life. 

I am staying for another minute, or two, or forever.

 

 

**Author's Note:**

> Hear me out.  
> It’s two a.m and I’ve had a long day. This is what happens when I have a long day.


End file.
